You cannot make like

November 2002

The days passed quickly, with my afternoons dominated by my telephone call to Maggie. No matter where I was, it was a ritual, like daily prayer.

The next day, she asked me about exercise, and said rather cheekily, 'what is your favourite exercise?' I told her I like to cycle, walk, play football and even go to the gym or do aerobics. I mentioned everything, except what I thought she was looking for.

'But honey, what is the most fun way to keep fit?' she said

'I've told you everything I can think of' I said. 'What did you have in mind?'

'Ok' she said, 'you have a challenge, write to me of what you think will be the best way we can keep fit together'

So that evening, I wrote her an email, as was my normal habit. In it I described how we could use each of the methods above to stay healthy; 'for example we could cycle around the great parks of London'

My descriptions were long, and meant to infuriate her. Then, after my signature, I wrote what I believed she wanted me to say; 'of course when we have done all this, if you still need more exercise, we could always make love'

Her reply was as follows; 'yes honey, I believe that for us, making love will be the most wonderful exercise, it will be our only entertainment. But, honey, to make love, you need love, and you have not said you love, you only say you like me. You cannot make like'