Monday, October 23, 2006

Mistake no more

January 2003

‘I never think about that’ she said. ‘Always think we will be together, no more parting’
‘Well you need to think about it’
‘Honey, I will wait for you. So this is life. Nothing is perfect’

Then to change the subject, she said, ‘I will let you know more about the trip tomorrow, I will speak to another agent, but this agent will not take the credit card, so will have to pay cash.’

‘Well you do what is best babe, and have a think about whether you want a time limit’

I wanted her to repeat that she would wait for me, but she didn’t, and when the conversation ended a few minutes later, I felt a pang of disappointment that would stay with me throughout the night.

The next day I had another long email with various options for trips. I didn’t read it. I was more interested in her other email though. It said:

‘Honey, you know I will wait for you no matter what… you are the person who I want to walk together with for the rest of life… when you find true love, you must never let it go, otherwise will be regretting for whole life… I know we can wait for each other…. so no pressure honey, you loved one will be waiting here patiently… I have no doubts… we have waited a couple months already… I will look forward to our new life. .I know will be happy forever…’

So I got the response I’d wanted. So my mistake was a mistake no more. Without initially intending to do so, I had managed to change the expectation I’d created on the first day that I met Maggie, namely that I was certain of employment in Hong Kong.

I’d known for some time that the lie couldn’t last forever. I just hadn’t worked out how to deal with it.


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